The overachieving—and often musically talented—Asian American child has become a familiar face in American classrooms, social life and media.  In the popular comedy film, “School of Rock,” one of Jack Black’s students is a soft-spoken, shy, Asian boy named Lawrence, who is a gifted piano player.  When asked if he can play keyboard for the class rock band, Lawrence quietly replies, “No, I only play piano.”  The audience can conclude from the character’s overall behavior that Lawrence has been brought up to excel in academics and music, leaving little room for other methods of creative self-expression.  As the story progresses, he loosens up and fully embraces his role as the rock band’s electronic keyboardist.  The media often portrays Asian American children as products of a strict, no-nonsense upbringing that clashes with the relatively lenient American childhood.

In Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, author and Yale law professor Amy Chua proposes that the traditional “Chinese way” of parenting often produces successful, high-achieving children who excel in academics, extracurricular activities, and eventually, in life.   She shares the ins and outs of a personal parenting method replete with harsh criticism of her children, and at times, belittling insults and screaming matches.  It is this controversial method—one that encourages draconian-like discipline and discourages frivolous childhood activities—that has recently caught the attention of writers, critics, activists, and bloggers across the country. 

A graduate of Harvard College and Harvard Law School, Chua, has an equally impressive career resume.  As the daughter of Chinese immigrants from the Philippines, it is likely she faced many of the same family pressures that high-achieving Asian Americans struggle with today.  On NPR’s The Diane Rehm Show, Chua described her parents as “tough.”

“We had to speak Chinese and we had to drill math. No sleepovers, no boyfriends. I got in trouble for A minuses, but the point is that the strategy worked with me…Today, I’m not just very close with my parents, but I feel I owe them everything.”

In Tiger Mother, Chua writes about parenting issues that are familiar to various minority communities.  But when the Wall Street Journal (WSJ) published an excerpt in its Saturday Essay section, titled “Why Chinese Mothers are Superior,” readers and the online community—many of them Asian Americans—went wild.  Reactions ranged from outright anger to solid support of Chua’s parenting style.

The WSJ piece included several vivid scenes from Chua’s own home, including one where the author threatens her daughter with no lunch and dinner if she keeps refusing to practice piano.  It was a “war zone,” according to Chua. 

“I told her to stop being lazy, cowardly, self-indulgent and pathetic.”

Many people have reacted with negative emotions to the release of this article.  They are left wondering if an A+ or a successfully memorized piano piece is worth the cost of injured self-esteem and tension between parents and their children.  In her Sacramento Bee column this week, Niesha Lofing questioned the effectiveness of Chua’s parenting method as described in Tiger Mother. 

She quotes a clinical psychologist:

“Behind the rare, noteworthy prodigy trotted out as illustration of the efficacy of Chua and others' punitive parenting, there are a thousand who grapple with self-doubt and conflicted relationships with their parents.”

Lofing points out that putting too much stress on achievement and performance could lead to unhealthy expectations and equally unhealthy psychological reactions from the children. 

Popular blogger, Angry Asian Man, was a bit more vocal in his disapproval.  Calling Chua’s excerpt “cringe-inducing” and “stereotype-laden,” he asks readers, “What happens when kids realize that they actually hate the lives their parents have relentlessly pushed on them?”  

Such critics also seem concerned with the effect this piece may have on the way non-Asian Americans view Asian values.  Its portrayal of the “Chinese” parenting style may widen the gap of misunderstanding between the dominant Western culture and a seemingly rigid and oppressive Asian culture.  The polarizing gap is especially evident in the WSJ’s online “Journal Community” poll question that appeared alongside Chua’s essay: “Which style of parenting is best for children? Permissive Western parenting or Demanding Eastern parenting?”

The question seems to put East and West on opposing sides and asks readers to choose which method they prefer.

While the anger towards Chua’s extreme parenting measures continues, some hold that she is a brave voice in a sea of mediocrity.  In fact, Chua’s own daughter, Sophia, spoke out about her appreciation for her mother’s strict parenting style.  In a letter that was reprinted in the New York Post, Sophia writes,

“Having you as a mother was no tea party. But now that I’m 18 and about to leave the tiger den, I’m glad you and Daddy raised me the way you did.”

Sophia responds with the gratitude that Chua herself feels towards her parents after enduring years of intense discipline and high expectations. 

In the beginning of her book, Chua herself is careful to say that she doesn’t think her parenting style is necessarily the best way.  She says the book is meant to show her development from an ambitious “tiger mother” into a mother who is forced to question her own child-rearing methods.  It is meant to show, eventually, “how [she] was humbled by a thirteen-year-old.”

Amid the flying opinions and heated debates, we can agree that Chua’s essay has incited an impressive response from online social communities.  “The Tiger Mom Rap,” YouTube videos and various memes including Tumblr’s “Tiger Mom Says,” are just a few examples of the social media explosion that has occurred in the past few weeks. 

AsianLife invites our readers to think about some of the larger questions that arise from Chua’s essay.  What does this essay mean for successful collaboration of the traditional “eastern” culture and western culture in the U.S.?  How will it shape the opinions of Western readers?  Should Westerners reconsider the relatively “permissive” style of parenting and education that is prevalent in the U.S. today?

As always, we are interested in hearing what our readers have to say about current social issues, and we invite you to share your thoughts by answering this week's poll question.